How To Defuse A Milk Bomb

I was sitting at my desk and heard something fall over. So, I looked behind me, and there was a VERY swollen 1/2 gallon of 2% milk sitting on the bar. I guess I forgot to put the milk away. The A/C had been off all night while I was at work.

So, what do you do with a milk bomb?

1. Carefully pick the bomb up by the handle and gently place it in the sink.
2. Turn bomb and slowly pull the tab off the cap.
3. Clean cheese off of sink, wall, floor, fish tank, computer monitor, table, television, self, etc.

P.S. Remember to put the milk bomb in the side of the sink with the garbage disposal.

I love you Flylady!

I've known about Flylady.net for a while, and, quite frankly, I have been too damned lazy to read it. That is, until yesterday. I shined my sink! It took me several hours to get it done between clipping coupons and watching a warehouse fire from a grassy hill, but I did it! I may even take a picture and show you. Unfortunately, I don't have a before picture. But, if my dishes are still on the counter next to the sink, you'll have an idea. "Mystery water," indeed, Flylady!

And, as soon as I can watch this video without getting all choked up, I'll go on to step 2. http://www.flylady.net/pages/get_started_1.asp

Fuck you, Little Debbie!

That's right. You heard me. Fuck you. And let me tell you why, Little Miss 320 Calories Per Serving Zebra Cake TRAMP! Why do you have to make your snacks so delicious? I mean, couldn't you put jalepenos in them, or something?

I know what you put in them. Crack. It has to be! Please tell me it's crack so I can go to rehab and forget about the delightfully sweet, smushy goodness that is a Zebra Cake.

Are you in cahoots with the blood glucose meter companies?